The Worst Pinterest Fail Ever

While skimming through Pinterest fails last night, I came across one for the good old Bloomin' Onion. This made me a lot more excited to share this story with the world than I should have been. This isn't one you're going to top very easily.

It all started last winter when my boyfriend had mentioned this glorious creation to me that I had never heard of before. He described it - it sounded easy, and so I thought I'd give it a shot. I wasn't quite sure how I was going to deep fry the onions since I do not own a deep fryer, but after one of my friends suggested that I do it in a dutch oven (because thats how he frequently makes his), I figured that it sounded legit enough to try.

I went out, bought some large onions and vegetable oil and started on my way while Ryan and his friend sat with some beers in the living room. Looking at my dutch oven I thought to myself 'that is WAY too big for only these onions and seems like a gigantic waste of oi'. So I opted for a much smaller pot. Now this pot is roughly and eighth the size of a dutch oven and didn't have a proper fitting lid so I used the one from the actual dutch oven. Needless to say the lid was too big. I proceeded to fill the pot with vegetable oil and absentmindedly filled it to about 3/4 full.

Pure genius.

I'd now prepared everything, including the onions battered and floured - ready to go. After I turned the stove top on and put the lid on the oil (because that'll help it boil faster, I thought) it took about 3.5 minutes before it started going up in smoke more than Cheech and Chong. Ryans friend happed to be standing in the kitchen with me and no sooner had I turned to open the window to air the place out, the stove was on fire. Well, the pot was on fire on top of the stove. 

Now, before I continue, lets take a moment to reflect back on Grade 5 fire safety. Sparky always said not to put oil fires out with water…

Not only did I throw water on the fire, but the container used to fill the water had a tonne of flour still in it. 

I have never witnessed a fire ball in real life and I can't say I ever want to again. It exploded and flames shot up towards my 9 foot ceilings. Ryan came running in and he eventually found a table cloth to put it out with. Unfortunately, It got so hot while trying to take it out into the snow that he dropped it - and it hit the metal dog bowl by the window and burst into flames…again.

It was around this time that I had grabbed my computer, my dog and my cell phone and ran outside. I'd really lost all hope at that point and just didn't want to die. There was fire everywhere, smoke like i'd never seen in my life and I was having a major breakdown on my priorities (obviously since I picked the computer over my boyfriend to take with me outside).

Ryan managed to get it completely out and brought it outside ditching it in the snow. If it wasn't for him being there, I hate to think what would have happened. 

After airing out the apartment for about a week, It still took my another 4 weeks to clean up all of the oil, flour and smoke off of the ceiling/walls. A small price to have to pay for still being alive but as you can understand, I will not be attempting a blooming onion ever again in my life.

This is what a Blooming Onion SHOULD look like:

And this...is my kitchen....

- Lyss